Archive for April, 2011

Our pastor has been preaching through the words of Jesus that he spoke on the cross. I haven’t written much about it in my journal. I have not really been there mentally or emotionally. I had looked forward to the series, but I’m just too burned out and past the point of tired to really be all there. Is it a simple case of burn out and fatigue, or have I become so distant from God that the crucifixion and the Resurrection have faded from my life? I haven’t read the Bible in ages. Heck, I still have a few chapters to go before I finish the Bible-in-a-year plan I started in January of 2010! And the delay is not because I have been in deep reflection of what I read. I just don’t read anymore. I have been reading other books, but not God’s word.

So, Resurrection Sunday will come and go and I won’t stop to reflect. Nice.

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Above all else, guard your heart,
   for it is the wellspring of life. (Proverbs 4:23)

The student ministry just began a series tonight on toxic thoughts. We talked about four poisons in our thought life: negative thoughts, fearful thoughts, critical thoughts and discontented thoughts. Then we talked about a strategy that will help us detox our thought life – Identify, Reject and Replace.

As I processed along with T’s talk, I could identify the four poisons in my thought life and how I rarely do what is necessary to detox. However, I have noticed that God has grown me in the area of identifying the toxins. But I do not always reject and replace. Frankly and painfully, I would say that any rejecting and replacing that has gone on this past three-year eight-month period has been God’s supernatural insertion into my life. I certainly have been constantly negative about work (and my future). I don’t dwell as much as I did a decade ago, so I see where God has improved my mind/emotions. But, these improvements have only been because of the insane kindness of God, not because of my diligence and discipline.

I told the boys I’d write down two or three toxic thoughts I deal with and write out God’s solution. I encouraged them to do the same for next time we meet. May God do some cool things with my thoughts these next two weeks!

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. (2nd Corinthians 10:3-5)

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